Last week, a young boy was found hanging in his backyard by his sister.  He was only 14 years old and had just started high school.  He left behind a family, friends and people that cared. He also left behind a bunch of kids that spent a great deal of time doing everything they could to make him miserable. They bullied him, taunted him, brought him to tears and eventually, drove him to take his own life. What kind of kids do this?

I don’t like to talk about bullying. I don’t like talking about it because I was bullied. But it’s time. It’s time that all of us started to talk about bullying.

I was bullied for so many years and in such horrible ways that sometimes I wonder how I survived. My earliest memory of being bullied was when I was in first grade. It wasn’t until I was in third grade that my mom went to school to “talk to my class”. Suffice it to say that it was a complete and utter disaster and had the exact opposite effect of what I am sure she was trying to accomplish.  It got worse.  I didn’t tell her it got worse because even then I knew that she was just doing what moms do… She was trying to protect her child. I can’t begin to tell you the number of times I went home and hid in our big backyard tree and cried.  But by the time I got out of elementary school, I was pretty sure I had learned how to cope. I couldn’t wait to start junior high. I knew some of the bullies wouldn’t be going to my new school.

That sure proved to be irrelevant…. Before my  first week at the new school came to an end, I had a knife put to my throat.  I still didn’t tell my mom or dad. I just decided to make pretend I was sick. It worked. For two days – and then I either had to tell or I’d have to go back. I told and I never set foot in that school again. I was immediately put into private school. We were moving, so the timing had a lot to do with it, but my days of public school education came to an abrupt end.

It made no difference. I spent the next year and a half staring at a blank wall during lunch. I had not a single, solitary friend. Every day was torture. My mom was sick so I told no one about being bullied. And then my mom died and I started another new school. By now I was in 7th grade. For the next two years I was bullied every single day. I was bullied in class, in the halls, and always, always at the lockers.  I was followed home. I was beat up constantly. I remember girls sitting on my back and holding my ponytail and slamming my head into the sidewalk until I bleed, all while others cheered on. It was horrible.

Starting high school meant starting another new school.  Although the bullying was never as bad as it was during elementary and middle school, the scars and the damage had already been done.

I still cry when I remember the pain. Not just the physical pain, but the psychological pain. I cry for the little girl who hid in the tree and put a pillow over her head so no one could hear her. I cry for the lonely and scared pre-teen who was bullied both verbally and physically, and I cry for the sad and angry teenager she became. Most of all, I cry for all the kids who are bullied so badly that they feel the only escape is to take their own life.   It’s been 30 years and the viciousness continues. It sickens me. Bullying should be considered a hate crime. Maybe that is what it will take to get it to stop. Something has got to give.

Until next time…

elayne

My blog has been down for the past 1o days so I’ve had some extra time away from the laptop. I took one full morning to just walk around my neighborhood and actually pause to see the beauty that surrounds me. There is definitely something to be said about unplugging from the internet. Sure I checked out Facebook a dozen times a day and responded to emails, but I made a very conscience effort to get out of the house, with just my camera and keys. I’m thinking that this might be something healthy that I should do at least once a week. It centered me. It helped put things into perspective. It reminded me not to take each day for granted. It let me rediscover that I still have full use of my five senses and it brought me joy. Can’t beat that!

Until next time…

I woke up this morning feeling pressured. Not sure if it was because the temperature was in the 60′s or because one of my trees is already beginning to change.  Regardless, it hit me that tomorrow is September 1st.  September 1st marks the start of my favorite time of year.  First and foremost, it’s my birthday “month”. Secondly, football starts, which means I get to start cooking chili, corn bread, hearty stews and actually attempt to bake… Again. 

It also means that it is time to start sewing, paper crafting, stamping, card making,  and scrapbooking.  There is nothing I love more than staying in my p.j.’s all day and crafting, but this year things are different.  This year I am in N.C. Now that might not sound like a big deal to you, but believe me, it is.

I have to tell you, the people in my town are flat-out crazy. I’ve cautiously  observed them over the past 10 years and didn’t come to this decision lightly. Evidently the madness begins on September 1st  with the beginning of the entire towns transformation.  From pumpkins and haystacks to beautiful lawns covered in fall displays. Contests for the best decorated business in town; baked goods that make you gain 10 pounds just looking at them and every possible craft creation you can think of. As this is the first time I will be spending the entire season here, I decided it was time to get ready and get moving. There is no way I’m gonna be left behind.

I drove into town, walked into Michael’s and immediately got dizzy.  Are you kidding me?  I mean seriously people, what the heck? I walked up and down every aisle. There is Halloween stuff, Fall stuff, Thanksgiving stuff, Christmas stuff and New Year’s stuff. Martha Stewart has apparently jumped on the band wagon and I spend quite a bit of time checking out her items. This woman is a little nutsy too… I’ve never seen so many punches, papers, and every possible coordinating item in one place in my life entire. I flipped through her magazine to get some ideas and eventually walked away, thoroughly disgusted, and without one of her items in my cart. She makes it look so easy but I know there has to be a catch. I know for a fact that there is when it comes to her baking ideas.

Eventually I bought some Beacon’s 3 in 1 Craft Glue and a couple of other things I don’t need, for a total of $18.00. I have never gotten out of Michael’s for less than $100.00. Then I drove home and took a nap. Naps are good. They’re an escape from the realities of my life and I when I wake-up, I usually have a clearer head and better perspective.  Thank goodness I did this time time too.

I decided to just apply the K.I.S.S. principal.  I looked at myself in the mirror and reminded myself that I am not Martha Stewart. I could just “keep it simple stupid” and take this time to enjoy myself. So what if my cards aren’t perfect and my edges are a little crooked?  Who cares if my fabric pulls or I got my dirty fingers all over the white part of the card I created?  Will the world come to an end if I use the scarecrow that’s been in the garage for 10 years or if I just buy colorful flower pots at Lowe’s rather than plant a garden that rivals the Biltmore? I doubt it.

So, if you keep reading this blog over the next few months, you are sure to see lots of beautiful photos from around town and most likely, some not so great photos of my simple stupid creations.  You might even get to see some of my cupcakes with the hideous green frosting or a pillow that looks like it’s seen better days, but that I just completed.

This year  I’m going to stamp and glue and sew and cut-up paper and make cards and scrapbook pages and try to bake… Again… And most of all, I am gonna have a ball doing it! Until next time…

My middle child turns 22 today. It is the first birthday I have ever missed and I am feeling kind of low.

Like most 22 year olds who are living on their own for the first time, all she wants is a gift card to Target so she can buy food and curtains.

So on Monday, I went online and ordered her the gift card and a few extra little things. I paid extra for shipping to make sure it got delivered today.

Yesterday, Target emailed me to let me know they are having problems converting to their new computer system with UPS and my order will not be delivered until later this week. Seriously? My kid will have nothing to open on her birthday? What a nightmare. Completely unacceptable.

Birthdays are a big deal in our family. Actually, it is customary that none of us actually call it a birthday, but rather we celebrate our birth month. I have always made a point of making it a very special day nevertheless. I decorate, make a cake, cupcakes or whatever the child wants, and we either go out to dinner or my DH cooks their favorite meal. I take lots of pictures, encourage them to invite their friends and always try to make it a day to remember. Usually, I’m successful.

As clearly this was not going to be a day to remember if the poor girl got nothing from her mommy, I decided to make a little gift box for her. I added a picture of the Target Dog with a list of the gifts that will be arriving in shifts over the next few days.

A trip to the local UPS store, who now along with Target, is not one of my favorite places to do business with, told me it would cost $59.53 to get the four-ounce box to her today. And yes, that is the price for late afternoon delivery. For delivery before 10:30 a.m. it was over $70.00! Anyway, I handed over the debit card and told them to go ahead and ship it out. Major lesson learned.

Next time I will be sure to have the gifts wrapped and sitting in my closet to be taken out for the birthday child on their big day. Target is not be on my list of places to shop, at least until Christmas rolls around, and UPS has permanently lost a customer to the poor, struggling, good old-fashioned, United States Postal Services. Until next time…

I signed up for a beginners quilt class at Quilters Quarters.  Sadly, the class doesn’t start until the middle of October.  If you asked, my friends and family would tell you that there is no way I can wait until October. I am both compulsive and impatient when I want to start a new project.  So this morning, as everyone fully expected,  I went in search of some fabric so I can get a proper “head start”.

If you’ve ever walked into a good quilt shop, you know how amazing it is to see all of the wonderful fabrics, not to mention the beautiful quilts that are displayed. It can also be a bit intimidating if  like me, you can barely thread your sewing machine. Having already been to the shop to register for the class, and having managed to not yet make a total fool of myself, I deliberately set out for Walmart instead. 

I live in a small town and our local Walmart is probably one of the hot spots for a lot of the folks that live here year round.  To be honest, it was the first time I have ever been there and I was thrilled to see they have a craft department!
I did my usual sweep of the aisles and then stopped and stared at a shelf labeled Charm Packs.  What the heck is a Charm Pack?  A quick glance around confirmed that like most stores, this one is also understaffed. I was either going to figure it out on my own or be forced to actually call someone for help. 

It didn’t take long for me to figure out that a Charm Pack is basically pre-cut quilting squares.  These looked to be about 5″ x 5″. I liked the pattern and realized that if the pack only held pre-cut squares, what was I supposed to put on the back of the thing?  Another sweep of the aisles and I found some soft, pink flannel which I guess is what I am going to sew onto the back.  

The saleswoman was finally at the cutting table and asked me how many yards I wanted of the flannel. Huh? Yards? What’s a yard?  I told her I’d take two… She clearly realized I was clueless. She then asked me what kind of batting I was going to use and if I wanted to add a coordinating Jelly Roll? I must have looked like a deer caught in the headlights. She rolled her eyes and waved me to a wall that had more quilting stuff on it, and she began helping the next customer.  

I went to the shelf, grabbed a round thing labeled Jelly Roll that obviously coordinates somehow with my lovely little Charm Pack, and threw it, and a bag that was labeled “batting”into the cart.

Once I got home, I went directly to YouTube and started watching some videos that attempted to explain, in clear English, the concept of Charm Packs, Jelly Rolls and Batting. 

I took another nap, to digest it all, and can now say that I basically get the drift and I know exactly where I’m going to begin…
On October 13th, from 3:00 to 5:30 at the Quilters Quarters.  Until next time…